Wednesday 3 July 2013

Make Your Man Pay Attention

By Olivia Rostigus


Dealing with relationships that are up one day and down the next is very difficult indeed. Not knowing what you will face from hour to hour is depressing at best. There are ways to help you get through these times and hopefully, on to better ones.

Women tend to be more emotionally driving than men which can lead to a huge communication problem if not dealt with before the relationship comes to an end. There are ways of dealing with these problems before they get out of hand.

The first thing women do when he stops calling is to feel that it must be something they have done to cause it. Did she say the wrong thing? Did she do something he didn't like? A sinking feeling leads to filling in the blanks about what may or may not have happened.

Is there someone else that he did not tell her about? That is usually the first thing that women think of when he stops seeing her for no apparent reason. But that is not always what is really happening.

This is when she tries to make contact and he doesn't answer, at least right away. Distress sets in because she is run by emotion. So, she keeps trying to make contact and when he doesn't answer, she feels it may be over and doesn't know why. Maybe it is and maybe it isn't over.

This is the point where women need to pull back and assess the reality of the situation before making any more moves at all. Usually, they have been the one initiating the calls/texts and when they suddenly stop, fear sets in that he's gone. They need to take a huge break from this in a big way.

When he stops contacting you, it is time to wait and do nothing. Let him do the pursuing as that is his biological nature. Basically, ignore him for a while.

- At this point, let him do the contacting

- Make him wonder what you are doing, instead of the other way around

- Don't respond right away with calls or texts

- Don't sit sit by the phone

- Go into stealth mode

If he contacts you and wants to come over 'tonight' tell him you have other plans or that you are too tired. This will encourage him to plan ahead and have respect for you and the relationship. He needs to learn to work for what he wants and not have it just be given to him whenever he wants attention from you.

When he pulls back, you need to pull back farther during this time period. This will be his wake up call that you are not just sitting around waiting for him. Get busy, make plans and go out and have a good time with friends and co-workers. He needs to learn to plan ahead to spend time with you.

Playing hard to get encourages men to go get what they really want. And, they will if you set the tone. Pulling back from you is a sign that maybe he isn't really worth the effort or that he takes you for granted. You need to break his pattern of that and it can be done. And you can by following the steps above. If he doesn't respond, it is time to move on and quickly.




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