A codependent relationship is a dysfunctional one. Codependents have a pattern of behavior in which they need other people to like them and approve of them. They depend on others for their self worth and identity and go out of their way to please others, often sacrificing their own needs in the process. Codependency is difficult to treat as codependents are often in denial.
Boundaries are an important aspect of relationships. Codependents often have trouble with boundaries. They may be blurred in the sense that they try to fix the other person, even if their advice is ignored. They become too responsible for the problems and feelings of another person. Others may have rigid boundaries so that others cannot get close. Sometimes they will fall around between these two extremes.
True communication is usually absent in such a situation. The codependent person cannot afford to be honest for fear of rejection or abandonment. They need others to help them feel secure and so they will often give their partners support without thinking about their own feelings. They find their self-worth in taking care of others and pleasing them.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
A partner of a codependent person will often do little to discourage the dependency. They cater to the behavior as they feel that they are helping the person. However, they are actually just preventing any change from taking place. It is possible to break these patterns of behavior but it is often difficult for a couple to do this without help.
In such a situation, there is often a lot of denial. Codependents know they are unhappy but they often fail to recognize that this is partly their own fault. They are likely to blame the problems on the other person and the situation. They often feel shame and guilt and find it very difficult to acknowledge they have a problem, let alone reach out for help.
It may be necessary to receive guidance and support as it is often difficult to make these changes alone. Some of the changes that may have to be made is to spend more time with family and friends, find enjoyable hobbies and even to spend time apart to create a more healthy dependency.
The sooner someone reaches out for help, the less likely it is for the problem to reach critical proportions. Awareness, acceptance and then taking action is necessary sooner rather than later. Recovery is possible and there are various methods and techniques professionals use to address the issue and establish a healthy relationship.
Boundaries are an important aspect of relationships. Codependents often have trouble with boundaries. They may be blurred in the sense that they try to fix the other person, even if their advice is ignored. They become too responsible for the problems and feelings of another person. Others may have rigid boundaries so that others cannot get close. Sometimes they will fall around between these two extremes.
True communication is usually absent in such a situation. The codependent person cannot afford to be honest for fear of rejection or abandonment. They need others to help them feel secure and so they will often give their partners support without thinking about their own feelings. They find their self-worth in taking care of others and pleasing them.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
A partner of a codependent person will often do little to discourage the dependency. They cater to the behavior as they feel that they are helping the person. However, they are actually just preventing any change from taking place. It is possible to break these patterns of behavior but it is often difficult for a couple to do this without help.
In such a situation, there is often a lot of denial. Codependents know they are unhappy but they often fail to recognize that this is partly their own fault. They are likely to blame the problems on the other person and the situation. They often feel shame and guilt and find it very difficult to acknowledge they have a problem, let alone reach out for help.
It may be necessary to receive guidance and support as it is often difficult to make these changes alone. Some of the changes that may have to be made is to spend more time with family and friends, find enjoyable hobbies and even to spend time apart to create a more healthy dependency.
The sooner someone reaches out for help, the less likely it is for the problem to reach critical proportions. Awareness, acceptance and then taking action is necessary sooner rather than later. Recovery is possible and there are various methods and techniques professionals use to address the issue and establish a healthy relationship.
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